A Christmas gift to the next generation

As Christmas draws near, police and social workers are readying themselves for a season of the highest levels of family violence and child abuse.

This year former Liberal Minister, Bronwyn Bishop, mooted the idea of permanently removing children born to drug dependant mothers. The argument continues to rage about when to remove children from dysfunctional parents and if removing them will create more harm further down the track.

Still grappling with the question, and in the lead-up to this Christmas, more several thousand child protection workers and therapists from around the country turned out to hear one of the world’s leading neuroscientists outline his ideas about how to stop the cycle of abuse.

Dr Bruce Perry runs the Child Trauma Academy in Texas and has been called to deal with children involved in the Columbine High School shootings, the 9-11 terrorist attacks and Hurricane Katrina.

He says the brains of infants who are abused, neglected or traumatised, are biologically and measurably different and smaller to the brains of children with normal development.

His research shows that children with under-developed brains don’t have a choice about how they behave.

They are simply incapable of normal behaviour since parts of their brain which regulate normal responses have not developed capabilities to respond to normal stimuli.

The repercussions of his research should be far-reaching. They should also help bureaucrats figure out how deal with the problem of removal.

Asked at one of several conferences where he presented if children should be removed from abusive or neglectful parents, Dr Perry said it’s impossible to have a one-size-fits-all approach.

“Many parents simply don’t know how to parent well because they weren’t parented well. Often you’ll find that, given the chance, with a non-punitive approach, they will want to improve their parenting styles,” he said.

To this end, Dr Perry also took his ground-breaking work to groups of politicians and magistrates.

His extensive work has shown that parents, whose needs were not met as infants, will not know how to meet the needs of their own infants. He outlined a plan for all women giving birth to fill in a questionnaire to assess what services they may need to help them parent in the most effective way.

“If we can provide support and assistance to mothers as early as possible, we’re taking a preventive approach rather than waiting until a few years down the track when a mandatory report has been made,” he said.

“By then, the damage to the infant’s brain has already occurred and the family situation has escalated into an emergency response.”

Also the problem with removing children is that a mother is likely to simply become pregnant again and have another child. If the core problem isn’t addressed the inter-generational cycle of abuse or neglect will continue.

Dr Perry gave an example of a mother whose 12kg four-year-old was diagnosed as anorexic because she wasn’t putting on weight no matter how many calories she was fed. When a history of the mother’s care-giving was taken, it was discovered that she was fostered in more than a dozen different foster homes from infancy until she was eight, when she was adopted.

But by then, her brain, 96 per cent of which is developed by the age of three, was under-developed in the area of attunement. She was a “good” mother, meeting her daughter’s physical needs, but not her emotional ones.

The little girl, as well as the mother, were sent to a foster mother who taught about how to nurture, cuddle, touch and attune to the needs of infants. Within a month, with emotional nurture through touch, the child put on almost five kilograms without increasing her food intake.

By teaching the mother how to parent and nurture herself, thus activating and growing the under-developed parts of her “emotional” brain, the cycle of neglect was permanently stopped.

During two weeks in Australia, Dr Perry told success story after success story about how traumatised children (and their parents) can be treated, thus stopping the cycle of abuse.

Let’s just hope the power brokers in our government and bureaucrats in our child protection systems can see the economic rationalism of such a preventive approach.

It won’t change family violence statistics for next Christmas or next, but inter-generational problems are never going to be fixed in political time frames.

By Barbara Biggs

Source: Online Opinion

Book By Dr. Bruce Perry and Maia Szalavitz: The Boy Who Was Raised As a Dog: And Other Stories from a Child Psychiatrist's Notebook: What Traumatized Children Can Teach Us About Loss, Love and Healing

Cuddles give tiny brains a head start

Grey matters: leading US neurologist Dr Bruce Perry above, in Melbourne last week, says healthy brain development is dependent on children being raised in nurturing environments.Photo: Ken Irwin

NURTURING cuddles early in life not only give toddlers a sense of security and of being loved — regular hugs help their brains to physically develop properly, giving them the best start in life.

However, children who suffer extreme neglect — who rarely feel the warm embrace of a parent or carer, are ignored, never stimulated and not cared for adequately — show signs of stunted brain growth, potentially leading to a lifetime of difficult relationships, behavioural problems and lower educational outcomes.

World-renowned US neurologist Dr Bruce Perry, in Melbourne last week to speak at two conferences, said the brains of children who were exposed to extreme neglect and repeated trauma, such as domestic violence, did not develop the normal building blocks, or neural connections, that helped them form properly.

As a result, these children developed a brain impairment that workers in child protection, care and the law needed to be aware of, he said.

But Dr Perry, senior fellow at the US Child Trauma Academy, said the thought patterns and behaviours of neglected children were not the same as those of traumatised children — despite the mental health field's one-size-fits-all approach. "They will take all these kids who are struggling and they will try to intervene using a well-intended but overly simplistic approach. Our current approach to these kids with complicated histories is quite immature," he said.

Dr Perry, who has advised on children's needs after virtually every major horrific event in recent US history, spoke to MPs and other delegates at the World Psychiatric Association conference, and to family and child protection workers and carers at Berry Street Victoria's Children in Trauma, Trauma in Children forum.

The forum was shown CT scans of the developing brains of healthy three-year-old children, with average-sized heads, and then images of the brains of three-year-olds who had suffered "total global neglect". The neglected children's brain were significantly smaller with abnormal brain structures.

The cortex in neglected children's brains remains underdeveloped, making it hard for them to regulate their behaviour, and the parts of the brain associated with forming and maintaining relationships are also abnormal. Dr Perry said their care needed to replicate a normal infant's upbringing.

"A two-year-old who has been severely neglected would need to be held more … it would be completely appropriate to baby them … these kids like to be rocked and sometimes you have to build their capacity to tolerate touch."

The brains of children who have suffered repeated trauma produce high levels of stress-related chemicals, causing them to be impulsive, inattentive, highly anxious and to develop sleeping problems.

But programs such as Berry Street's intensive Take Two program — run with other health providers — which helps parents and carers repair damage done in early childhood, were a great initiative, he said.

Berry Street Victoria's chief executive officer Sandie de Wolf said Dr Perry's comments highlighted the need to support new mothers.

National figures released last week showed 10% to 16% of substantiated cases of child abuse involved babies under 12 months.

"All children deserve a good childhood … If we want healthy adults, we must ensure that … parents get the support they need," Ms de Wolf said.

By Deborah Gough

Source: The Age

Santa's Ghetto

Above by Banksy

Bethlehem is one of the most contentious places on earth.

Perched at the edge of the Judaen desert at the intersection of Europe, Asia and Africa in the state of Palestine it was governed by the British following the collapse of the Ottoman Empire. After World War II the United Nations voted to partition the region into two states - one Jewish, one Arab and there’s been fighting ever since.

It’s obviously not the job of a loose collection of idiot doodlers to tell you what’s right or wrong about this situation, so you’re advised to do further reading yourself (this month’s National Geographic has an excellent article all about Bethlehem).

We would like to make it very clear Santa’s Ghetto is not allied to ANY race, creed, religion, political organization or lobby group. As an organisation the only thing we’ll say on behalf of our artists is that we don’t speak on behalf of our artists. This show simply offers the ink-stained hand of friendship to ordinary people in an extraordinary situation.

Every shekel made in the store will be used on local projects for children and young people. Not one cent will go to any political groups, governmental institutions or, in fact, any grown-ups at all.

Salaam.

Source: Santa's Ghetto

Bright poor children 'slip back'

Clever children from poor families face being overtaken by less bright children from affluent homes, research suggests.

The findings are part of a study for the Sutton Trust which says UK social mobility has not improved since 1970.

It says rich children are catching up with poorer peers in developmental tests between ages three and five and will overtake them by the age of seven.

The government says it is too early to say what will happen to the young people the charity's report focuses on.

'International rankings'

But trust chairman Sir Peter Lampl said: "It's a terrible thing that children from poor backgrounds, who are bright, end up actually not getting a very good start in life.

"They end up in schools that aren't very good and end up poor as adults and that's a terrible waste of talent and it's also basically wrong, it's just unfair."

The trust's study by the London School of Economics and the University of Surrey concludes that the UK remains very low on the international rankings of social mobility.

The researchers looked at data relating to children born between 1970 and 2000, to determine whether the decline in social mobility between previous generations had continued.

They found intergenerational income mobility (whether you are richer than your parents or not) for children born between 1970 and 2000 had stabilised.

There had previously been a sharp decline for children born in 1970 compared with those born in 1958.

Degrees

The report said: "Children in the poorest fifth of households but in the brightest group drop from the 88th percentile on cognitive tests at age three to the 65th percentile at age five."

Meanwhile those from the richest households who are least able at age three move up from the 15th percentile to the 45th percentile by age five.

Report authors Dr Jo Blanden and Professor Stephen Machin conclude: "If this trend were to continue, the children from affluent backgrounds would be likely to overtake the poorer children in test scores by age seven".

They also said while 44% of young people from the richest 20% of households were awarded degrees in 2002, only 10% from the poorest 20% did so.

The report concludes: "Parental background continues to exert a significant influence on the academic progress of recent generations of children.

"Stark inequalities are emerging for today's children in early cognitive test scores - mirroring the gaps that existed and widened with age for children born 30 years previously."

Minister for Children Beverley Hughes said it was encouraging to see that "the previous decline in social mobility in the UK appears to have stabilised".

"As we look to the future we hope to see more evidence of our reforms making a real difference to people's lives," she said.

"This new research is based on the Millennium Cohort born in 2000-01. It's far too early to say what will happen to those young people over their lifetime.

"Those children have yet to enter Key Stages 2, 3 and 4, where overall standards are continuing to rise and poverty gaps have narrowed since 2003."

Also see video report
Source: BBC

'I only loved one of my twins': The shocking confession from a depressed mother

Above Confronting the past: Sophie Richards with her 17-month-old twin daughters Gracie (left) and Mia

Seven months after the birth of her twin daughters, Sophie Richards hit rock bottom.

Dizzy from lack of sleep and weak from having no time to eat, she went to comfort the girls who had been screaming nonstop for hours.

"For the hundredth time that afternoon, I picked up the babies to try comfort them," she says.

"Mia calmed down a little, but Gracie did as she always did - arched her back and kicked her legs as if she was trying to get away from me.

"She looked possessed. The glint in her eyes said she hated me, that she wanted me to die. I was close to throwing myself off the balcony."

Sophie, then 21, was suffering from a severe form of post-natal depression (PND).

It was an illness with a heartbreaking and unusual twist: she had managed to bond with only one of her little girls and thought that the other tiny child hated her.

Post-natal depression is an alarmingly common problem. Previously, it was thought that one in ten women suffered from it, but a survey earlier this year for the Royal College of Midwives revealed that 20 per cent of new mothers had treatment for PND.

One explanation is that women receive less support than they did in the past.

"New mothers used to have ten days in hospital to recover," says Diane Nehme, secretary of the Association for Post-Natal Illness.

"These days they are discharged between eight and 48 hours after giving birth. There's no time to rest, no time to learn the basics of baby-care."

Add to this the lack of extended family support and it's no wonder women are struggling.

More worrying still, the stigma attached to the illness means that statistics could be higher still.

"Many women are ashamed to visit their GP and admit they aren't happy during what is meant to be such a wonderful time," says Ms Nehme.

Failure to bond with a baby is a common result of the condition, a problem made worse in Sophie's case because while rejecting one child, she doted on the other.

After Mia and Gracie were delivered eight weeks prematurely in April 2006, Sophie admits she became "besotted" with Mia, the first-born, stronger twin, but struggled to form a relationship with Gracie.

"I was rushed into hospital for an emergency Caesarean because one of the twins wasn't growing properly," says Sophie, who lives in Hertfordshire with her partner Ian, 27, an IT consultant.

"There were so many medical staff in the room, I didn't actually see the babies being delivered.

"They wrapped Mia up and showed her to me, then rushed her off to the special care unit.

"Gracie was resuscitated, then also whisked away. I'd had this dream of starting motherhood with a baby on my chest.

"Instead, I was wheeled up to the ward without them, surrounded by other happy mothers with their babies. I felt numb."

And it was 24 hours before Sophie was allowed to hold Mia, and several days before Gracie was well enough to be cuddled.

"A few days later, I was holding Mia when the midwives suggested I try skin-toskin Kangaroo Care - putting her down my top to regulate her heartbeat," says Sophie.

"I was instantly overwhelmed with love and excitement."

In contrast, the first time she held Gracie, an intensive care alarm was triggered.

"It gave me such a fright - I can still hear the beeps in my head," says Sophie.

"From that moment on, I was terrified of Gracie. She seemed so fragile and it felt like she was telling me I was inadequate as a mother."

"Feelings of inadequacy or guilt can be symptoms of PND," says Ms Nehme. "Some women also find it hard to bond with their baby."

Other symptoms of the illness include sleep disturbance, feelings of intense anxiety, lack of concentration and low self-esteem, as well as thoughts of hurting the baby or themselves, though these are rarely acted upon.

No one really knows what causes the condition, but it's believed to be a mixture of hormonal changes after the birth, plus a genetic predisposition to depression.

"There are other risk factors, such as if you've undergone a recent bereavement or had your babies taken away from you to special care," explains Dr Amanda Jones, a psychotherapist who works with babies and parents.

"Sometimes, becoming a mother can unearth memories of a problematic relationship you may have had with your own parents."

For Sophie, this was particularly relevant.

She grew up with a violent mother who repeatedly physically abused her before abandoning her when Sophie when was only 15 years old.

Despite this disturbed upbringing, Sophie had started to make a success of her life.

Aged 20, she was dating Ian, had a job in a bank and had won a place at college to study interior design. Then she discovered she was pregnant.

"It crossed my mind to have an abortion, but Ian was so excited about becoming a dad," she says.

"We sat down and discussed it, and we cried and cried. In the end, I decided to have the baby."

Except the baby, singular, became babies - at an early scan, doctors discovered Sophie was carrying twins.

"Everyone was congratulating me, but I was in tears. How on earth was I going to cope with two?" she says.

When the girls arrived several months later, Sophie's worst fears were realised.

"To begin with, I was terribly anxious," she says.

"We brought the babies home from hospital three weeks after they were born, still with feeding tubes in their noses.

"I was so worried, I wasn't able to sleep for fear that something would happen to them.

"Ian was great, but he had to go back to work after a week. I had no one to help me, and the girls cried so much I couldn't even leave the room to go to the loo. The flat was a mess.

"I spent the first four months taking them for long walks - either they were crying or I was."

One day, when the twins were about four months old, Sophie took them to the baby clinic to be weighed.

"It was a freezing cold day, the girls were hysterical, but no one would help me," she says.

"I ended up holding one under each arm, pushing the pram with my stomach even though I was still in pain from my C-section.

"The three of us were in floods of tears all the way home. I was crying so much I couldn't even see the stairs to my flat.

"Then I put them down, still screaming, and didn't even try to pick them up. All I wanted to do was run out of the door."

Sophie's problems were made worse by her complete lack of attachment to Gracie.

"She had this expression that reminded me of my mother when she was about to lash out," says Sophie.

"It made me want to thump Gracie, like my mother did to me. But I didn't.

"I put her in her cot, walked away and made myself a cup of tea."

Although Ian was incredibly supportive, after six months Sophie realised she needed professional help. She saw a GP who gave her anti-depressants, and was referred to Dr Jones who diagnosed PND.

"It made me feel better that my condition had a name - that I wasn't going crazy," says Sophie.

"But the hardest thing was that I had to delve into my past and talk about my mother. It was something I tended to keep bottled up inside."

This was the start of months of intense therapy - treatment that continues to this day.

"Sophie felt that the baby was screaming at her," says Dr Jones.

"I helped Sophie realise that babies can't feel hatred or anger. But her pain was making Gracie feel frightened which, in turn, made Sophie even more upset."

Over a series of sessions, Dr Jones helped Sophie to see the world from her daughter's point of view and to change her anguished facial expressions with the aim of calming her baby.

Confronting her past was painful for Sophie.

"I definitely started to feel worse before I got better," she says.

"And there were still difficult moments. When the girls were nine months old, they went for a series of developmental checks and Gracie scored lower than Mia on some.

"I was annoyed that she refused to roll over, which she happily did at home," says Sophie.

"I still didn't feel maternal. I would have preferred to be on a beach with a Martini."

Last October, Sophie went back to work part-time.

"Though it was tiring, I enjoyed the sense of normality and having adult company again," she says.

"It was so hard leaving the girls every morning, but, actually, I was pleased about that as it showed I was feeling more attached to them both."

Slowly, without even realising it was happening Sophie's relationship with the girls, particularly Gracie, continued to improve.

"It helped that they were more physically robust and able to play together," says Sophie.

"But most of all it was my change in attitude that made the difference.

"When Gracie cried, I accepted it was because she was frustrated, not because she hated me.

"I stopped seeing her as 'the bad twin', and I learned how to comfort her. She responded with calmness and happiness."

In April the twins celebrated their first birthday - a jolly affair with matching polka-dot dresses and giant pink teddy bears.

Eight months on, Sophie is head-over-heels about both her daughters.

"I realise how incredibly I lucky I was to get help - I hate to think what might have happened otherwise," says Sophie.

"I look at Gracie now and think: 'How could I have felt that way towards her?'"

• The Association for Post-natal Illness is on 020 7386 0868, www.apni.org. Help Me Love My Baby is on Channel 4, at 8pm, next Monday.

Source: Daily Mail

Comment: Respect to Sophie for having the ability to be emotionally honest. I'm sure she will be a great Mum. She is an inspiration to us all.